Tag: fun

He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, “Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?”

The man below says: “Yes. You’re in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field.”

“You must work in Information Technology,” says the balloonist.

“I do” replies the man. “How did you know?”

“Well,” says the balloonist, “everything you have told me is technically correct, but It’s of no use to anyone.”

The man below replies, “You must work in management.”

“I do,” replies the balloonist, “But how’d you know?”

“Well”, says the man, “you don’t know where you are, or where you’re going, you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault.”

-http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/d72mt/so_helium_walks_into_a_bar_and_orders_a_beer/c0y2p2z

A tourist walked into a pet shop and was looking at the animals on display. While he was there, another customer walked in and said to the shopkeeper, “I’ll have a C monkey please.”

The shopkeeper nodded, went over to a cage at the side of the shop and took out a monkey. He fitted a collar and leash, handed to the customer,saying, “That’ll be $5,000.”

The customer paid and walked out with his monkey. Startled,the tourist went over to the shopkeeper and said,“That was a very expensive monkey. Most of them are only a few hundred pounds. Why did it cost so much? ”

The shopkeeper answered, “Ah,that monkey can program in C – very fast,tight code,no bugs,well worth the money.”

The tourist looked at a monkey in another cage. “Hey,that one’s even more expensive! $10,000! What does it do?”

“Oh,that one’s a C++ monkey; it can manage object-oriented programming,Visual C++, even some Java All the really useful stuff,” said the shopkeeper. The tourist looked around for a little longer and saw a third monkey in a cage of its own. The price tag around its neck read $50,000.The tourist gasped to the shopkeeper, “That one costs more than all the others put together! What on earth does it do?”

The shopkeeper replied, “Well, I haven’t actually seen it do anything, but it says it’s a project manager”.

– From “Clean, Funny Jokes” ( mariosalexandrou.com)